Paul Ryan Goes Fishing

What did I do this summer?

Well, there was all that nomination business, but that doesn’t mean that there wasn’t time for some rest and relaxation.

Paul Ryan tells a tale of a fishing trip.

I went fishing with a couple of buddies. We were hanging out in nice New England town. It was an Island. A resort town called Amity Island. One of my buddies was a crusty old barnacle that was wise in the ways of the sea. He’d served proudly in the US Armed Forces. My other buddy represented the long arm of the law. No illegal immigrants getting past Chief Brody. He does his part to stem the tide of 9 trillion illegal immigrants streaming across the border annually.

We were trawling around, fishing and fishing. We caught lots of fish. A dozen, two dozen. Actually, I think we caught five hundred fish.

The boat was overflowing with fish. But that wasn’t the biggest catch of the day. The biggest catch of the day was the great white shark. It wasn’t just any shark. It was a genetically modified super shark.

Someone saw the shark and said “We need a bigger boat.”

I think I said it. Yes, I said it, so we got an aircraft carrier. An aircraft carrier loaded with gunships that took out the cybernetic super shark at my command.