It’s only a matter of time before self-publishing becomes the next traditional publishing, an outmoded, outdated form of publishing. You-publishing is the next wave of publishing. With you-publishing, you publish my novels and collections of short stories. You-publishing can be …
Dear Unpublished Guy:
I usually don’t respond to the pathetic pleas of a person who has made the misplaced presumption that they are a writer. As I indicated in my initial communication, your submission exceeded our gazette’s word count by …
Dear Unpublished Guy:
Do you actually think kittens are tasty? Judging by the short story you submitted to our journal, you must have dined exclusively on kittens for many years. To call your submission fiction would be inaccurate. In …
Moments that grip, surprise, twist, amuse, frighten, and seduce have no business in fiction. The unpublishable writer must consider half-baked, haphazard moments. The story won’t elevate to the level of unreadable unless it’s stuffed full of these moments.
…
He was a high school biology teacher working on a special science project.
Book Cover – I Was a Teenage Clone
I Was a Teenage Clone tells the story of Mr. Landon, a biology teacher at the local high school …
Dear Ms Unpublished Guy:
We were dismayed that your short story title, Happy People, had not intended to be ironic. The gratuitous acts of good will were truly appalling. We have never before read a story that contained so …
Chip is just like you or me. A blue, frosty complexion. He had chocolate drop eyes and a vanilla wafer tongue. But something made Chip different.
Book Cover – Chip
This is the incredible story of a pastry chef with …
The Setting of My Story Mapped
A sleepy, bucolic setting, as is the case in many towns in the heartland, Romulus is located on the Mississippi/Georgia Border. The population was 1885 in the 2010 census. The town was founded by …
Dear Unpublished Guy:
In response to your book proposal:
We applaud your effort to write a free verse epic villanelle. However, as is clearly stated in our submission guidelines we don’t accept Ambrose Bierce Wormhole Westerns. Clearly, the epic …
A Book Unpublished by Me – Invitation to Raise the Debt Ceiling
Cincinnatus C is under sentence of death for an ambiguous, unspoken capital crime. He knows exactly when he will die—tomorrow, when he will hang. Sitting in his small …
